


The fire is slowly dying (And my dear, I'm still goodbye-ing)

by SpicyCheese



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: Canon Divergence, F/F, Mutual Pining, Pre-Canon, Snow, Soft hurt/comfort- injury style, They meet before they first meet is what I mean, bed sharing, whiskey by the fire
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-25
Updated: 2019-12-25
Packaged: 2021-02-25 22:07:19
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,406
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21872689
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SpicyCheese/pseuds/SpicyCheese
Summary: Lena peers out into the near-white out conditions and sees a very out of place tangle of bright red and blue in the pines just beyond. She grabs her coat and gloves and tromps out to investigate. It’s her final day of an impromptu vacation, the first and likely last shall see in years. Yet even in an off the grid cabin in the remote mountains, it seems trouble has no issues landing on her doorstep.or, The Happy endingMiseryAU
Relationships: Kara Danvers/Lena Luthor
Comments: 35
Kudos: 336
Collections: Supergirl Femslash Secret Santa 2019





	The fire is slowly dying (And my dear, I'm still goodbye-ing)

**Author's Note:**

  * For [drfitzmonster](https://archiveofourown.org/users/drfitzmonster/gifts).



> To my dearest bud, Dr.Fitzmonser Esq., 
> 
> I’m so lucky and excited to get to gift you a fic this holiday! Hope you like it. It’s got the “soft hurt/comfort” and “sleep intimacy/bed sharing” your prompt requested :) Enjoy!

*-*-*-*-*

Bad luck. Karmic retribution. Whatever you call it, trouble seems to find her. So when Lena hears the crash outside- the sound of trees snapping and earth shaking due to impact of something at high velocity- surprise takes a backseat to annoyance. 

Lena peers out into the near white out conditions and sees a very out of place tangle of bright red and blue in the pines just beyond. She grabs her coat and gloves and tromps out to investigate. It’s her final day of an impromptu vacation, the first and likely last shall see in years. Yet even in an off the grid cabin in the remote mountains, trouble had no issues landing on her doorstep.

Scoops of snow cave in over the tops of her boots, soaking the bottom of her pajamas, as she clomps through shin-deep fluff towards the crash site. The scene is a mess, broken branches and turned up ground. Maybe some kind of miniature plane had crashed? With the blizzard at near peak, only an idiot would be attempting to fly in this. It’s not until she’s almost directly over the wreckage that the picture becomes fully clear.

“Oh you've _got_ to be kidding…”

There, in a pile of broken pine boughs, is Supergirl.

As in cousin of _Superman_.

This is most precisely what Lena does not need. She has plans damnit! She’s been making them for months! Plans to change her company, to finally break free from her last name and the from the Luthor Legacy, and step out on her own. Plans to show the world that she’s here to help, and not to simply take her place as another in a long line of heartless villains.

Having a Super half-dead in her backyard might undermine that message. 

It feels beyond just weird bad luck. This feels intentional. Snow whipping everywhere and her glasses inside where she left them, it’s hard to tell for sure but Lena doesn’t _see_ any hidden cameras. Which means this is real. Fate’s latest sick little joke. 

Lena sighs, breath a fog that swirls the falling snow in front of her slightly. In reality, a large part of moving LuthorCorp to National City is in hope of some kind of partnership with said Superhero. Lena’s been a fan since the moment the alien stepped on the scene and who better to team up with to prove you’re for the betterment of humanity than an official guiding light of hope?

Though the longer the alien is laying frozen and unconscious in the snow the less likely that plan is looking. 

A gust of cold wind whips past her, biting at her cheeks as she hugs her arms tighter around herself to brace against it. There’s no denying she needs to do something, the question is what. She may be a fan, but she’s also Luthor and the track record the Super-Luthor combination hasn’t been great. While she has only good intentions, there’s no way for Supergirl to know that. 

Then again…there’s no way for Supergirl to know that she’s a Luthor at all. Unless she tells her. 

She’ll keep that one to herself.

“Right then. Let’s to it,” Lena mumbles, conviction lacking even to her own ears.

Without protocol for this wildly improbable event of the world's most powerful alien crash landing in her backyard, she says the first thing that seems mildly reasonable. 

“Excuse me?” 

Whether unconscious or simply rude, the alien doesn’t respond.

“Ms… Supergirl? Are you alright?“ Lena tries again, words carried off by the howling winds. Trees around her creak and smaller snaps and pops of branches in the surrounding wood lend an ominous warning. Darkness is falling and the storm is just about at full power. Lena can’t afford social niceties much longer. 

Years of mandatory CPR classes means she knows what comes next on the _Are They Alive?_ checklist, but it requires a hands-on proximity that’s she not quite sure she should undertake. 

Issues with that exist on multiple levels, most prominently the ramifications of startling an all-powerful being that could rip your arms off like toothpicks.

Standing as far back as she can (safety first), Lena takes a branch and pokes the alien in the side. Still no response. From a meter away she notes the gentle and rhythmic rise and fall of the hero’s chest, so breathing- _check_. That’s something. At least she doesn’t have a dead superhero on her hands.

Lena knows she needs to act, to continue, but can’t help just staring. She’s seen Supergirl on TV, standing akimbo above a vanquished foe against the backdrop of a grateful city. On the news, it’s like she stepped out of the pages of a comic book- rugged and battle torn (and hair still impeccable). In short, gorgeous. And powerful. 

Yet against the stark white snow, the hero looks delicate. A perfect fallen angel, serene and in desperate need of protection…

How the woman makes half- dead look good, is beyond comprehension.

Another strong gust hits her, icy and biting, and it’s clear the remote approach isn’t an option any longer. Any further assessment or hesitations need to wait until they’re both safely inside.

“I’m gonna bring you inside, OK?” A CYA she hopes will translate as she positions herself behind Supergirl’s head.

Placing her hands under the woman’s armpits, Lena bends her knees in preparation. “Ready? One, two, three, OOF!! “

Lena was a champion fencer in college. She spends hours on her feet in the lab soldering together inventions. She walks at least 8000 steps a day running around LuthorCorp. 

She makes it about four steps before her arms give out, toppling both of them back into a fresh patch of snow.

“What are you, made of lead?”

Despite “lifting with her legs”, no amount of technique can make up for the fact that the Supergirl apparently has the density of a black hole. “OK new plan,” Lena grunts, floundering in the fluff until she’s on her feet again. “I’m going to find something to drag you on.”

Supergirl doesn’t respond, though the way fat snowflakes catch on her eyelashes comes off just a bit too picturesque not to be derisive.

Lena rolls her eyes. “Don’t go anywhere.”

Abandoning the hero, she tromps her way to the small shed next to the cabin. Unsure what she’s hoping to find, her brain spins on the possibilities. Her chopping branches for makeshift sleds or some sort of ice melt product and a wheelbarrow combination. 

Each idea is more ridiculous than the next but a sworn Protector of Humanity is quickly becoming a Kryptonian frozen dinner for bears right here in her backyard so she’ll settle for the improbable. She’s envisioning ways to retrofit the propane tank for controlled jet-propulsed by the time she finishes digging out the area in front of the shed door and prays that she’ll find a less combustible option inside.

She opens the door and if there’s anything but snow in the heavens above they must be smiling on her. There, in the corner, sits a large SnowTube. 

Half-inflated and decorated to look like a frosted donut, the inflatable sled is likely leftover from when she’d loaned out the cabin to Sam and her daughter last season. 

“Arias, I could kiss you,” Lena mumbles. Making a mental reminder to gift Ruby something extra fabulous this holiday, she grabs the sled and drags it outside.

The short journey back across the yard is a montage of slapstick fails. If it turns out she is in fact on hidden camera, there’s not a moment of B-roll footage, as Lena gets caught in a cycle of toppling over in the now almost thigh-deep snow and chasing after the wind-caught innertube as it skitters away from her grasp. 

Eventually, after expending her year’s allotment of expletives, she does manage to get the Kryptonian onto the sled and then into the house, dragging the alien the last five feet from door to living room floor before collapsing into the armchair herself.

This is not how she pictured her vacation ending. In fact, she can say with certainty having an unconscious alien passed out on a garrish inflated donut in her living room is not something she’s _ever_ envisioned. 

Can’t argue that it’s drastically improved the aesthetic of the room though. 

She’d be lying if she said her admiration was limited to the hero’s altruistic deeds. Lena has _eyes_ for godsake- so it hadn’t escaped her that the newest Super on the scene looks like she’s stepped out of a goddamn magazine and could bench press Lena with one hand. 

Certainly, no one needs to know that Lena’s found satisfaction many an evening alone, envisioning scenarios involving a certain blonde, caped-crusader. Or that the background of her phone may or may not be that first photo of Supergirl- sopping wet but elated- standing on the wing of the airplane she saved. 

It’s one thing to have fantasies about a distant celebrity, it’s quite another to have them in front of you in real life. Having them unconscious,half dead, sprawled out spread eagle on her cabin floor is and entirely different third thing.

Lena stands, moving behind her chair and leaning down until she rests her forearms on the back of it. She takes in her uninvited guest with a critical eye because behind the giddy school-girl like crush, is a well-seasoned feeling of wariness. The kind you get when you walk under a ladder, or a black cat crosses your path. 

Proximity to a Super has the same superstitious feeling of dread, like she meddling in something that will surely be to her detriment. Unsurprising really. She watched Lex unknowingly buddy up to a Super in disguise (how someone so smart could be fooled by a pair of glasses is still beyond her) for _years_. She watched her brother be equally charmed by the man and repulsed by the alien, but drawn into them both in like kind. It’s said ‘absolute power corrupts absolutely’ but Lena’s always wondered if the contrast is what really drove Lex mad. That after a lifetime of being the best in his pursuits, realizing there was someone (two, in his mind) that would always be _better_ became a truth too hard to reconcile. 

Lena has no delusions of grandeur herself but there is a total and undeniable magnetism, a pull drawing her into Supergirl's orbit, even from across the room. She can’t help but go in for a closer look. 

Edging nearer she takes in long limbs, lean muscles, face peaceful, solemn,and earnest. If she didn’t know any better this could be any blonde woman. A yoga instructor (well, more like CrossFit) or a barista at her local coffee shop in Metropolis. And what kind of fate that she would fall here? At Lena’s remote cabin? 

Now, right at the Supergirl’s side ( _when did that happen?_ ) Lena notices some sap on the hero’s cheek. She goes to wipe at but quick as lightning the hero’s hand instinctively snaps out, halting on Lena’s forearm before her hand reaches its mark. 

The grip isn’t tight but is firm enough to telegraph the panic. With a groggy expression, the alien eyes open and at first glimpse of Lena, eyebrows shoot up

“Oh.” She says, surprise melting into almost sheepishness. “Hi. “

“Hi, “ Lena replies dumbly, because it honestly she had no idea that eyes could _be_ that blue.

“What’s happened?”

It’s more inquisitive than demanding, a pond the question p grounds Lena back to the present situation more than the hand still holding her forearm does. “I’m not sure – I heard a crash outside. I found you just beyond the tree line and brought you inside.”

The alien frowns. “Who are you?” 

“Lena,” she answers, resisting the urge to roll her eyes at how stupid it sounds. _Just Lena,_ like she’s a 22 year old Pop Star without a last name. “Who are you?”

“Kara. I mean _–ohhhhh_ ,” hero winces, looking down at her uniform. She swallows the flub admirably though. “You can call me Kara.”

Supergirl - _Kara-_ looks to the side and squints, her face contorting in concentration a moment, before slacking in defeat. “My powers are out” then, full of exasperation, “Alex is going to kill me.”

Lena has questions. So many questions. Which powers, the same as her cousin? And out for how long? Does this happen often? Also what kind of supreme being must this Alex be to strike fear in the most invincible person on the planet?

Supergirl moves to stand out let’s out a yelp and grasps at her leg.

It happens fast. Lena’s never been the nurturing type but her hands leap to the spot almost instinctively, cradling the limb with gentle care. Supergirl flinches just slightly at the contact. 

“Relax, I'm not about to go all Kathy Bates on you,” she huffs lightly. “Though I am a bit of a fan. “

“Yeah,” Supergirl says, gazing at Lena rather oddly, “Same.”

“What?” Lena looks down to see if she’s wearing her LCorp sweatshirt, something identifying, but comes up blank.

The heroes eyes wide slightly. “Oh, uh, I just mean- it’s not every day you wake up to someone so –uh… “ her leg jutters, she grimaces. “Do you have a phone? “

“The lines are down.” Lena grabs the portable phone from its cradle anyway, feeling the need to prove it for some reason. “But the caretaker was planning on picking me up to take me to the airport tomorrow morning when the storm blows over. I’m happy to give you a lift back to civilization then. “

“So you’re saying I’m stuck here for the night? “ Supergirl tries the phone, holding it to her ear. She places it down a moment later, clearly satisfied with the truth of _that_ situation at least.

“I’m afraid so. “

Supergirl rubs at her knee, the unaffected part of her leg, as if it might translate. “You don’t have anything for pain do you?“

“In a manner of speaking but I think first we should get you out of these clothes…” Lena’s brain catches up to her mouth. “I mean – I’m just not sure the short cheerleading skirt look was meant for our current conditions. “

“Hey!” Kara bats at her half heartedly, injury clearly fuzzing her thoughts a bit.

“May I…” Lena gestured to the Super's red boot. She gets a pained nod in return.

Pulling down the zipper feels less intimate than her half dozen personal fantasies have lead her to believe. When the grunts and murmurs are out of pain,tends to lend a more somber mood, she supposes.

They manage to get that boot off with some effort and then it’s Lena’s turn to wince. Mottled bruising is already clouding over majority of her shin and the bone underneath tents the skin over the injury site. “Tibia fracture,” Lena frowns. ” I’m willing to bet on it.”

“Are you a doctor?”

“Scientist,” Lena deflects. Kara shivers, pale skin looking wan, glow ebbing some. “And we really should get you cleaned and warmed up.”

“My cousin has a whole hideout made of ice. The cold usually isn’t a problem… “

Lena has So. Many. Questions.

Supergirl shivers again, wincing as the movement jostles her leg. “Okay. You’re right, warm would be nice. But I… I can’t...”

The world's strongest being is alone and helpless before her and the only thing on Lena’s mind is how cute the Super’s little pout of embarrassment is. She’s not sure if that’s a good or bad thing.

They manage to get to the bathroom, depositing Supergirl on the closed toilet seat. She wobbles a little. “You’re looking pale and that’s saying something coming for me,” Lena tuts. “Let’s get you into the shower. “

Supergirl’s affect focuses for the first time since they began this leg of the journey, lips closing into a firm line if she looks away. “I’m not sure I can stand on my own right now… “

“Oh. “ Lena frowns a moment until she realizes what the hero is implying. “Oh! “

“You don’t have to – “

“-No, no it’s fine! Really. I’ll help you. Let’s uh…” gestures around her own shirt, brain still processing what was about to happen and hoping that the hero gets the hint because she’s not sure she’s quite capable of words just now.

Thankfully, that’s exactly what happens. The hero pushes her hair to the side and reaches behind her neck and pulls at a zipper, but eyes close for a moment and she almost loses her balance. She fumbles to try to brace herself but Lena swoops forward, catching her.

“Whoa there,” Lena says getting her back upright.

“Can you uh… “ One hand loosely indicates towards her back as the other grasps the sink to balance herself,

To all the world Lena is the Stone-cold freshly minted CEOof a billion dollar tech firm, but behind that she’s really a fairly ordinary gay disaster. One now faced with neutrally undressing the most beautiful woman in the world – nay- Universe.

“Sure.” Her voice nearly a squeak.

She moves to the side of Supergirl, pulls the zipper down and thinks of France, of Queen and country, of nuns and boring formulas and- _God_ , it’s the most beautiful back Lena has ever seen. Her traitorous hand reaches out on his own accord smoothing a palm over the flawless skin.

Hand there, she can feel the hero’s breath hitch and the little shiver that goes through her. It’s enough to break the spell. “Sorry, I –… let’s just get you warm… “

Lena turns on the shower and Supergirl shimmies all of the rest of the clothes, making it to her legs before nearly toppling over again.

“Here, let me get it,” Lena kneels down and now instead of just a bareback she’s suddenly dealing with a bare _everything_.

Marshaling all of her restraint, she focuses on the tights of the uniform, pulling them down over well shaped calves. She manages well actually except when she looks up again and is face to face with- “Abs. “

Her mouth drops open realizing she said that out loud. She can feel the heat in her cheeks, she’s probably nearly burgundy colored, but when she looks up to her surprise the hero herself looking a little pink tinged as well. 

Almost looking ashamed Kara mutters, “I might be alien but I have the same parts you do… “

Lena to chuckles darkly “Trust me, I do not look like _that_ under my clothes. “

“I’m sure you…” Kara of buttons her lips back again “Maybe let’s just, uh, “ she points towards the shower.

“Yes. Yeah. “ Lena nods like a bobble head, and they work together to do just that.

Nine excruciatingly awkward minutes later, Supergirl is wrapped in a towel, seating herself back on the toilet seat once more.

“ Thanks, “ she rubs her hand over her knee looking down at the ever darkening bruising of her shin. “I feel better. I mean at least less hypothermic. “

“Good. I can grab you some clothes. Do you think you can get dressed on your own? If not I can-“

“-no no no I think I can. “ The hero says to fast to mask the embarrassment.

“Oh. OK good.” Lena tries to remember that she shouldn’t be disappointed about this. “I’ll go grab some.”

She swipes the only clean things left, a pair of sweats and her MIT T-shirt, and hands them back through the door to Supergirl. “Take your time and let me know when you need me to help you out of there. “

“OK! “Their hero says chipper and quick and clearly trying to expedite the privacy.

Lena closes the door behind her and takes her first full breath since the ordeal began. The cabin is one room and sparsely furnished, an impulse purchase leftover from Lex’s brief infatuation with Thoureau. While the setup is perfect for peace, quiet and transcendental musings, it is not catered to guests. There’s no Internet, no TV, and the book selection consist mostly of scientific journals and the sort of non-fiction that people only read when I have a lot of time on their hands. There’s not even a couch. Just an armchair by the fire and a twin bed in the corner.

“What am I going to even do with her?” Lena mumbles, body directing her to the small kitchenette, to the _whiskey_ , automatically enough to probably be concerned.

She doesn’t have much time to decide. The bathroom door opens moments later and Supergirl braces herself on the doorway, struggling one-footed to remain upright.

Lena sets down the glass and bottle, rushing to the super’s side “What are you doing!” She dips herself under the hero’s arm, bracing her body weight.

“I didn’t want to bother you…” words come out through gritted teeth as the duo makes their way to the armchair. 

“I’ve already- Oof,” Kara continues they deposit her in the chair,. “I’ve already put you out enough.”

Lena thinks about pulling up a stack of books to sit on, but ends up sitting on the bed adjacent instead. “It’s no trouble at all.”

“I’m just lucky you were here. What are the odds someone would even be up here this time of year?”

“Exactly why I _am_ up here. It’s kind of my yearly escape.” 

“What are you escaping from?”

Lena bites her lip. Is holding back lying? And if so, is lying to a superhero villainous by nature? She’s had years of lessons in manipulation and deception from the world's best (worst) teachers but what if Kara somehow saw through it? That Wonder Woman is said to have a Lasso of Truth… maybe it’s something like that? 

Lena shouldn’t care, has absolutely no reason to care what this person thinks of her, but more than the fear of being found out- the idea of lying to Kara just.. feels bad. 

“Work,” Lena settles on, with the benefit of it being true. “I’m about to make a big transition so lots of loose ends to tie up.i want to be rested and fresh.”

Supergirl eyes her lightly, as if she can read the missing information, but thankfully moves on. “Sounds stressful.”

“A bit,” Lena shrugs. Mouth suddenly dry, she stands, makes her way to the kitchenette for her previously abandoned booze.

“That thing isn’t looking so hot, “ she nods at the limb question as she walks. “It alright?”

She gets a nod from the superhero whose eyes are still closed. She watches the blonde inhale deeply through her nose, a centering breathe, and exhale slowly before opening her eyes once more. “You mentioned something about medicine? “

“ I'm not sure it’s FDA approved.” She holds up the glass and bottle in hand, “But trust me, it works.”

She pours as a generous amount into a glass, enough to raise the Super’s eyebrows. “You think I need that much? “

Lena takes a sip, “Oh, this one’s for me. A superhero landed half dead in my backyard remember?” Supergirl laughs at that, “Would you like one though?”

Kara rubs her leg, “I think I better.”

Doling out a slightly less generous pour into the other glass before, Lena takes their drinks and makes way back to the fireplace.

“Does alcohol even affect you?” She sits on the bed adjacent, notices Kara’s managed to scoot the armchair so they’re facing each other more directly.

Taking the offered glass, she shrugs. “Not usually. But when my powers are out, I’m more or less human so…”

Their knees are almost touching, and the flickering firelight makes the moment feel intimate. Lena swirls the liquid in her glass, “Have you ever had scotch?”

“I haven’t, “the hero says, eyes transfixed on the motion. She looks back up with a smile, “I’ve given it as a gift before though. My sister likes it.“

Lena takes a sip, buttoning her mouth over the tumbler to keep from 1 million questions spilling out. There are things she wants to say, to ask, (and strangely divulge) but Supergirl doesn’t know who she’s talking to, who she’s being vulnerable in front of, and Lena’s not sure if that makes it more or less okay to talk so candidly. 

The sharp bite of the alcohol burns away enough words that once she swallows she’s ready with a less invasive response. “Well this should be interesting. What shall we drink to?” She lifts the glass a bit “To Truth, Justice, and the American way? “

“How about _‘Hope, Help, and Compassion for all’_?”

“Is that, yours? You motto?” 

“I think so. You like it?” The hero looks almost bashful asking.

“I do.” For some reason the words, here in this space, spoken with that plain honesty, strike a chord within Lena. “Well then. Start us of.”

“To ‘Hope, Help, and Compassion for all.”

“Cheers,” Lena leans forward clinking their glasses together, eyes set on the other woman as she takes a sip.

The full grimace Kara pulls too comically adorable to be real. “HO! HAH! Oh- that’s- woo...”

“It has a kick, yes,” Lena laughs. 

“Are you sure that’s not gasoline? It tastes like burning wood.”

“18 years aged in an oak barrel will do that.”

“And people like that?” Kara asks, taking another tentative sip. Better braced, wince is more manageable this time. 

“$150 a bottle. I’d say so.”

“Oh geez- that’s like half my weekly salary.”

Lena raises an eyebrow at that. “I didn’t realize Hero work pays so poorly.”

Kara turns bright red, clearly another misstep. “Oh, uh, itwas just a figure of speech.”

So Lena’s not the only one holding things back. 

“So what are you doing way up in these mountains anyway?” Lena asks, giving the Super some room to regroup. She takes another sip liking the way the familiar way the heat starts to seep through her. “We’re a long way from National City. “

Kara shrugs, “Just doing some thinking I guess. “

“In a snowstorm? “

“It’s hard to find a quiet place sometimes.”

“With SuperHearing especially, I’d imagine,” Lena hums. “I can relate to that. The needing quiet. “ 

“Yeah that work transition you mentioned.” She takes another sip, this one without grimace. “I can relate to _that_ too.”

“Thinking of changing careers so soon?” Lena crosses her legs feeling a bit more comfortable, limbs loosening just slightly. “I think I can speak for the public when I say the good work you’ve been doing would be sorely missed… “

“No I don’t want to give up helping people. It’s just…” Kara looks Looks down to her glass as though it holds an answer. “Do you ever wonder who you would be if given the choice. I mean from day one. Without people's expectations... “

Lena takes a sip, the alcohol barely touching the waver inside her, the feeling of familiarity. “Yes actually.”

“Well that’s what I was thinking about up there.”

“And how did you end up down here? What happened?”

“I don’t know,” Kara looks at the fire, frowning.”I was flying along and it was like I suddenly hit a brick wall- powers drained like I’d been shot with…” she shakes her head. “It was weird.”

It’s only due to practice being in the public eye her entire life that Lena’s able keep the tremor in her hand at bay. Because this was Lex’s cabin for a long time, and while she thought she was quite thorough inspecting it and cleaning it out when he went away, there is the very distinct possibility some anti-kryptonian defense mechanism could be behind the downed hero in front of her. “Yeah weird,” is what she manages, taking an extra healthy gulp to settle the remaining nerves.

Her guest is still staring in a way that makes her suspicious as to how smooth her performance really is, but there aren’t any follow-up questions.

Instead, they sit, staring at the fire. 

It was a big glass she poured, and now it’s rapidly becoming empty. Lena blames the reptilian part of her brain, the part the scotch hasn’t muddled fully yet, for what she says next. “You know, I wasn't lying when I said I was a bit of a fan”. 

“Of me?”

“MMHM,” and the vibration of the hum through her lips feels nice. “That first picture of you, standing soaking wet on the wing of that plane… “. _Hot, powerful_ … “Even before I knew you and your cousin were related I thought you looked like you were so ready to take on the world. Like that’s exactly in perfectly where you want to be. It’s… inspiring.”

“Yeah well, I waited a long time for that moment. And it certainly wasn’t planned,” Kara grumbles into her glass, also nearing empty.

“Why?” She knows she’s being bold. “Why did you wait?”

There’s a little crinkle in the hero’s forehead when she concentrates that’s Lenas desperate to smooth out. “Because the people around me kept telling me it wasn’t safe. “

Lena’s snorts, laugh wholly undignified but contempt unstoppable. “The world's most powerful being and they still treat you like glass just because you’re a woman. Unreal.”

Kara’s lips curl in an attractive smirk that sets a few dozen things aflame in Lena. “Sounds like you have some experience in the subject? “

“Older brother,” she huffs, hiding her flush in the last of her drink. She sets it down and reaches for the bottle. Gestures to her guest “Another? “

“Sure.” 

Kara holds out the glass, sloppily, and Lena cups it to steady, her fingers brushing Supergirl’s. It feels electric, almost a literal spark. So surprising Lena nearly let’s go, causing the glass to drop. 

She sits down, backs up, a self imposed time out because she _needs_ it. 

“How is your _leg_?” emphasis on the last word aiming for light teasing but still sounding a bit flirtier than it should.

Kara gives a wry smile, “You were right about this stuff, “ hold up her glass. “Leg feels pleasantly numb.“ She chuckles, “So does the tip of my nose actually. “

Supergirl taps her nose experimentally and the results are more adorable than Lena can handle. She takes another drink to keep her mouth occupied from saying anything she might regret. Her own tongue feels thick and loose, she knows this is trouble.

Sam once told her she was a flirty drunk. They’d had too much champagne after closing a particularly difficult deal. That night ended with Lena placing an un-subtle hand on the Sam’s thigh and leaning in… and her friend gently catching her chin before reached his destination. “ _If this were 10 years ago_ …” Sam had said, smile kind and cunning and still just as attractive. Sam always had a way of making Lena feel comfortable and capable, and somehow even the rejection felt like a complement.

Supergirl is not Sam, but even in the short time she’s been here they’ve established a connection. Sparks. That, plus the devastating attraction, isn’t easy to ignore. Sober or drunk.

She leans back, bracing a hand behind her which presses her legs more flush against Kara’s uninjured one. “What’s it like? To have super powers?” Words slip out, well lubricated at this point.

“Overwhelming,” the remaining ice clinking sharply in her glass as she gestures. “On Krypton I didn’t have any powers. When I arrived I was 14 and everything was so bright and loud and literally foreign. “ She laughs. “Imagine ninth grade but the volume is cranked to 44.”

“I’d rather not, “ Lena imagines her own grade school experiences, none of which she’d like amplified in any way _._ “How did you manage? “

“I had people around me who cared about me and were helpful. They helped me learn control, to focus on just one thing at a time instead of everything at once. It took a lot of practice.”

Supergirl looks down at her drink, swirls it just the way Lena had before. “I think that’s part of the reason why they discouraged me from using my powers. I think to them I’ve always been that same scared little girl.”

Lena knows that tone, has lived that feeling fully. She leans over places a hand on Kara’s knee “We are more than anyone has ever expected of us.”

It’s the kind of grave seriousness only full inebriation can bring, but luckily Supergirl is just Kara, and Kara is on her wavelength. She covers Lena’s hand, gives a squeeze. “Thanks.”

Then though, she stares into Lena’s eyes, and something shifts. Something that feels like Lena’s something but could not possibly be because fantasy is not reality and there is no way the _Girl of Fucking Steel_ is interested in her like that. Lena retreats, leans back, away.

A blink, and that look fades from the Super’s face, and she clears her throat with a cough. . “Erm, so, uh what would you do? With superpowers I mean? “

“Other than curl into a ball?” Lena laughs. “I highly doubt I would handle them with as much poise as you do.”

“Oh please! “Supergirl batts away the words, sloshing the ice around in her drink. “You’re way strong.”

“ What are you talking about, you don’t even know me!” Lena laughs. “We just met. “

“Au contraire! “ She holds up a finger in exception. “In that time you’ve rescued me from a blizzard, tended to all my wounds, and even gave me medicine!” Holds up for a drink at _cheers_ motion before taking another sip. “Seems like _you’re_ the hero. “

Lena has never been called a hero. She’s been called many things but not that one, and suddenly the heat in her cheeks has nothing to do with a drink in her hand.

And that’s when the lights go out.

“Shit,” Lena hisses. She hops up in the dark, looking out the window to investigate. 

“Do you have a generator?”

“I do…” Outside, said generator is silent but smoking. “Crap, it must’ve been running this whole time. Maybe the power kicked off while I was outside with you? Shit. Shit shit shit.”

“What does that mean for us?” Kara asks, worry seeping into her tone.

“No heat or electricity til we leave tomorrow morning,” Lena swipes a hand down her face. “It’s going to be a cold night.”

“Oh. Well no big, we’ll keep each other warm.”

Lena’s head snaps up at that. There is no way she means it the way Lena wishes she would. 

“I mean there’s only one bed,” Kara rushes, cheeks flushing attractively, maybe realizing the implication. “I just assumed we’d just share…?”

“Oh, no- I can take the chair.” 

“Psssh, no way,” Kara says tossing a loose hand in dismissal. “You can’t sleep sitting up… Unless,” she pauses. “Unless you’re uncomfortable being that close with an alien?”

“No! – That’s not it I just… You’re hurt. I wanted to give you some space was all.” And because she’s fairly certain platonically sharing a bed with Supergirl will require feats of restraint she just doesn’t have right now. 

“Well that’s nice of you but totally unnecessary. We are sharing. That’s final.” She punctuates the point setting the glass tumbler down a bit harder than necessary on the side table.

“Okay,” Lena acquiesces, even though it’s anything but. “When did you want to turn in?”

“Actually I’m feeling kinda woozy so maybe laying down now would be good?”

“Sure.” Lena gets up, and in turning to face the bed finds Kara’s not the only woozy one. She peels back the covers and stands staring at it just a moment longer than normal people probably should, trying to wrap her mind around how she’s going to manage to keep her cool about this.

The answer is she might not. When She turns around, Kara is waiting, illuminated by only the crackling fire, her blue glinting eyes trained on Lena. Fucking _stunning_. “A hand?”

Lena helps Kara into the bed, taking a deep breath before sliding in as well. They barely fit shoulder to shoulder.

“It’s like a sleepover,” Kara whispers conspiratorially, the little snarf of a laugh at the end endearing to an almost insane degree.

“ I haven’t had a sleepover since college.” She doesn’t add that those sleepovers often entailed less than platonic activities.

In her peripheral Supergirl to be looking her way, and Lena knows that if she were to look and turn, objects would be far closer and more intimate than she’s prepared for. 

“This is… cozy.” Lena says, trying not to focus on each and every spot her body is in contact with the other woman. 

“Reminds me of when I was a kid. I used to have nightmares-I mean I still do but not as bad now.” The hero begins, speech a little more slurred and voice trailing off a bit as she visits the memory. “I’d crawl in my sister's bed at night, and she’d hold my hand and we tell each other Big Words. “

“What? Like _‘onomatopoeia’_?“ Lena huffs at the ceiling.

“No that’s just what we called it when we’d say those really heavy things. You know,the ones you can only say when it’s pitch dark out.”

 _Dark like this_. The fire is down to embers, casting deep and full shadows across the room. Yet Lena’s warm inside and out. While she was honest about not being lonely, there’s no denying the company kept today has made her feel seen and understood more than she has in years. In eons. She feels at home in Kara, safe, maybe even more so than she might a fully powers-endowed Kryptonian. 

“I’m afraid I’ll end up like my family.” Her words spill out into the inky dark around them. “They’ve done some terrible things. I’m afraid if I don’t spend every waking moment doing good, if I slip up just a second, let my guard down, but I’ll do the same things as well. “

“I'm afraid I’ll disappoint mine. My parents.” Kara says, and she sounds small as Lena feels. “They sent me here with a mission to protect my cousin in the world, to pass along traditions and keep krypton alive, when I got here… “ A pause. “I’m just afraid I can’t be what everyone wants me to be. “

Lena slips her hand into Kara’s, lacing their fingers together.

A sniffle, and then, stronger, “Alex says destiny is what we make it.”

“Funny. My brother used to say the same thing.”

Kara turns, and Lena can smell the whisky on her breath, the heat of it on her cheek. “Do you believe it? “

“I want to believe it.” Kara’s thumb rubs slowly over hers. Back and forth. “I know it’s as good as we get, but it just never feels like enough.”

Lena turns her head slightly and sees Kara staring at her. She knows that the other woman doesn’t have x-ray vision of the moment, but Lena feels flayed open, raw and exposed. 

“It’s strange. That I had landed here,” Kara says, tone taking on a different quality to it now. More present. Focused. “Fate may be what you make it, but something feels purposeful about this. Like we were supposed to meet. “ Kara looks down at their hands. “Does that make sense?”

“I feel it too,” Lena almost whispers. Their faces feel close even in this darkness, and there’s that same magnetic pull drawing her in. As it has all night. 

Kara reaches out without preamble, tucking a strand of hair behind Lena’s ear. Instead of retracting her hand though, she lets settle on Lena‘s temple, drawing down to almost a cup her cheek.

Lena’s breath catches, heart nearly stuttering, tripping over the rapid staccato in her chest. She is not imagining _this_ , this is not some late-night fantasy, not some lonely hearts daydream. Supergirl- Kara- is here. And real, full of joy and pain, and a depth that fills her to the brim. And she’s looking like she wants to kiss Lena.

Her mouth is the only thing about her that’s dry at this point and Lena licks her lips trying in vain to remedy that. She doesn’t imagine the way Kara’s eyes are drawn to the motion or even the way other woman starts to move forward just an inch, just one small inch. They both hold their breath.

Kara stops though. Something akin to pain flashing across. “I'm not feeling so good.”

“Oh god, are you going to throw up?” Lena props herself up on an elbow. “ Here I can get a-“

“-No. just getting...kind of skinny drowsy, “ Kara gives a long, slow blink, head nodding some.

Injured. Inebriated. And Lena’s bern keeping her up. “You should sleep.” she resigns. And though she can still feel the thrum between them, adds “We both should.”

Kara’s brings their linked hands up, placing a kiss on Lena’s wrist. “Thank you. “ she says, voice soft and sure.. “For everything.”

“Of course.” And Lena feels she’s made of glass, transparent and breakable in Kara’s grasp. 

Kara sighs, and rolls onto her back, finally relinquishing Lena’s hand. It only takes minutes, before she hears Kara’s breathing even out, and lets her own guard down enough to try as well. She falls asleep to the slow rhythmic breaths of the hero beside her. Safe and warm. And at home. 

  
  


*-*-*

The next morning Lena wakes to a knock on the door and an empty bed.

“Just a second!” She shucks her feet into slippers and wraps her arms around herself against the cold morning air. 

When she opens the door and finds Leonard, the cabin caretaker, who upon seeing Lena’s state of sleep-dress, politely averts his eyes. 

“Morinin’ ma’am,” he says to her side yard. “You said 9 AMpick up, right? “

“Oh. Yes. Sorry – give me a few minutes? “

“Sure thing,” he tips his hat and turns to head back towards his truck.

Cold and hungover, the night before feels far away, like a dream. Except their whiskey glasses are still by the fireplace and the garish sled by the door. All that’s missing is the hero herself, who apparently left without a second thought. 

People leave. She should be used to it but this…Feels different.

 _No_. Why should it be different? Lena is still Lena, the common denominator hasn’t changed. She doesn’t want to think about it, so she focuses on gathering items. A quick change, she grabs her bag and is nearly out the door when she sees it. The note on the counter.

She almost keeps walking. Almost, but she’s a glutton for punishment. Three long strides over she snatches off the counter and reads.

  
  


_Lena,_

_Woke up and had my powers back. I have to get to National City pronto, to check in and make sure everything‘s OK. I’ll be right back- I don’t want to not say goodbye!_

_-SG_

  
  
  


_SG. Supergirl_.

“Lord, what was I thinking.”

Now, in the harsh light of day she can see the tragedy more clearly. This can never be a _thing_ , Kara and her, because outside of this cabin they will always be a Luthor and a Super. Lena Luthor is about to move to Supergirl’s city, it will only be a matter of time before they run into each other and their meeting again will only be under very different circumstances. 

This was one night but she feels like she’s losing the most special person she’s ever met. Any further clinging to soft sentiments now can only prolong the heartache for later.

She folds the paper carefully, like delicate lace, and places it in her jacket pocket. Sealing the moment in time next to her heart. She takes a last look at the cabin, I snapshot to remember the strangest and most wonderful night, before locking the door behind her. 

Outside the sun reflects bright and blinding, searing away the night before in its brilliant reality.

“Ready? “ Leonard asks as she slides into the cab of the pickup beside him.

“As I’ll ever be.”

They bump and stumble down the road, the truck’s snow plow cutting a new path forward through the fresh field of white. 

  
  


*-*-*

Her face is the picture of poise and control when he enters, as if Clark were any other reporter and not the former best friend- turned rival - turned nemesis of her only sibling. 

She’s quite proud of her restraint which is why the total and utter loop the other visitor throws her for is so devastating.

Her assistant mentioned Clark having a guest, a cousin and wannabe reporter, but it’s only now faced with the same blonde hair and blue eyes from the mountains that her brain fully absorb it. 

Clark is _Superman_ , so his cousin must be- “Kara.”

To her credit, Kara manages to limit her reaction an open mouthed gape before clearing her throat. “Lena _Luthor?_ ”

“You two know each other?” 

Kara practically flinches at Clark’s question and Lena finds herself on familiar turf, springing into action to save. “My assistant mentioned Clark would be bringing a guest. A Kara…”

“Danvers,” Kara says, shaking Lena’s offered hand. It feels solid and warm, just like before and Lena let’s go far sooner than she’d like.

The rest of the meeting goes as expected, Clark insinuating, Lena defending, but all she can think about is how this will likely be the last time she sees Kara.

Maybe if Lena had pretended not to recognize Kara on site, pretended to be the fool her brother was- blinded by the mediocrity of glasses and corn-fed manners... maybe then Lena could have kept her. 

Kara’s (playing) a reporter, there would have been plenty of excuses for Lena to be close. She could have given Kara exclusives, insider tracts, they could’ve gone to lunches and on walks in the park and Lena could keep those eyes in her life. The ones that saw just _her_ , liked _her_ , maybe even lov- “I hope this isn’t the last I’ll see of you.” 

The words tumble out, just this side of desperate, as the Kryptonians finish and make their way towards the door. 

“Same, “ Kara says, smile a well practiced facade so good it shows even Lena up. That alone is the answer. All she is a is Luthor. One that knows more than she should. Knows a secret identity.

They exit and Lena shouldn’t be surprised. She knew the moment Kara left that their next meeting would an appointment by last name only. She just didn’t think it would hurt this much. 

She leans on the desk, palms on the smooth white and looks out towards the city. She moved here to do good, to break from her past, not to date. Not to fall for someone on the furthest end of unattainable. 

She hears the door open behind her, Jess letting her know her 1 o’clock is here. “I need a minute. Can you tell Josh to push the meeting back by 15?”

“I could but I’m not sure how he’d take it.”

Lena spins to find Kaa just inside the door. She gives a sheepish look. “I told Jess I forgot my notebook.”

“Oh.”

Kara sighs. “You know,” she says, steps towards her slow and measured, “When Clark said we’d be paying Lena Luthor a visit it never in a million years clicked it would be you.”

Lena leans back against the desk, happy to have something solid to prop her up. “Oh?”

“I don’t know why,” Kara shrugs, looking around. “Brilliant scientist, trying to make a break from her family and do great things for the world” she stops in front of Lena, looking her straight on. “That’s the Lena I knew you as.”

“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you my name.” And Lena cringes at how small, how fast, she says it, but she needs this over. Quick, like a bandaid. “You were hurt. I guess I didn’t want to, I don’t know, to make you panic. Or feel in danger.”

“Was all the rest true? The things we talked about…” Kara skips over, says it fast as well. She steps forward even further as she does, nearly into Lena’s space now. “Because I don’t usually share…stuff like that.”

“I don't either,” Lena worries her fingers, turning them over in her other palm. “I told you those things because I wanted to. Because I felt,” she bites her lip, looks to the ceiling. “Because I felt like there was something. A connection. You made me feel at home.”

Kara looks at her, that same intense stare, head slightly cocked to the like she’s unraveling a puzzle. “Same.”

This is worse. Worse than an explosive fall out, than Kara screaming about the lie told. To have unrequited feelings would be manageable but to have feelings confirmed that can never come to fruition? 

Lena takes in the sight of Kara, then closes her eyes. She wants to savor this moment before it goes. Take a mental snapshot before this woman, this perfect woman, flies away. Before she says goodbye.

She opens them, dabs at a stray tear that managed to escape, and readies herself. This is the end. This is where they part, a far more bitter note to end on than the saccharine of their time in the cabin. Reality is rarely as sweet.

“Can I buy you lunch?”

The gears in her mind grind to a halt so fast, she has whiplash. “ _What_?” 

“Lunch. Least I could do for the woman who saves my life,” Kara grins. Then, “Also I feel terrible for ditching you the next morning.”

“I- alright,” shock propelling the words more than anything.

Kara holds out her hand, “Shall we?”

Lena takes it wordlessly because five minutes ago she was sure she’d never have the chance to again. When Kara laces their fingers together, Lena has to forcibly swallow back the emotion. 

They exit the office, into the lobby. “Jess? Reschedule Joshua please.” It’s addressed to her assistant and despite the appraising look she gets back, Lena doesn’t for a second consider letting go of Kara’s hand. She looks to Kara who is grinning ear to ear, adding, “And my 3pm too.”

The elevator dings and they walk inside. They stand shoulder to shoulder, smiling at their reflections in the brass as the doors close. They are like idiots. 

Kara rubs her thumb over Lena’s. (Like maybe more.)

Luck may not be her thing but fate is what you make it. And Lena feels finally like that may be good enough after all. 

  
  


*-*-*-*-*


End file.
